Our Adoption Story – Episode Eight
The Introduction of Our Future Son
The first Thursday of July 2017 was such a blur for me! I went from rushing upstairs to the office to read the messages from Mark, to frantically calling him to find out the details. A very excitable Mark answered the phone, and right away he told me that Sally has found a boy and he sounds perfect.
A huge surge of adrenaline hit me, I asked Mark for more details; all he could provide me with was a name and age…. literally that was it! Sally told him we would receive some emails that day with more information and an image. We both agreed to wait until we got home to look through everything together. We calmed each other down, confirming that he wasn’t ours yet and that we shouldn’t get too excited as it could all fall apart. So we hung up and tried to carry on with the rest of our days.
As I hung up a conflicted feeling came over me. I pictured telling my team at work and seeing their disappointed faces, as I had literally just had a promotion to store manager and promised them a better workplace; as they were all sick and tired of the current store working. I decided to rip the plaster off and go down onto the shop floor and tell the management team right away. They were obviously over the moon for me, but I could see in their faces that they were worried.
This day seemed to fly by so fast, yet drag on so long. The emails from Sally came through, I was so tempted to have a cheeky look but I refrained and waited until I was home with Mark. I walked through the front door and was welcomed by an elated Mark (with a bottle of wine in hand), he was so excited and happy; then suddenly my empathy for my work colleagues vanished.
A Familiar Symbol
We sat down (with a very large glass of red) and opened the emails from Sally together, We couldn’t read his full profile fast enough, then we saw his face in one of the attachments. In this picture he was wearing a yellow grow with a Manchester bee on; after what happened to us and other at Ariana’s concert, we felt that this was a clear sign that it was fate.
Then it hit us hard, he was our son and he was perfect.
From this moment onwards we were dads, and we would have done anything to secure this little boy and welcome him into our lives.
Sally called to confirm that we had read the profile and wanted our opinion, we told her right away that we wanted to move forward with him, that he seemed perfect! She replied saying, “you don’t need to move forward with him, I’ve already done the hard work!” we were a bit confused to what she meant. She elaborated some more and basically, behind the scenes she had already been to matching meetings for him and we were the family picked to raise this beautiful brown eyed boy.
The BEST Social Worker
A matching meeting is held by a group of social workers, some representing potential adopters and then others representing the child or children searching for a forever family. It was Sallys task to basically sell us as the ideal family for the child up for discussion. It is then up to the child’s social workers to decide which family would suit him or her best. According to Sally we were in the mix with 9 other families and we were the ‘winners’ hands down.
He was ours. A little baby boy was out there in the world, a complete stranger and he was going to be our future son, a really weird thought to get your head around. That evening we let our thoughts run wild and tried to get some sleep. Sally was going to call us and send us more details and pictures the following day.
We received a selection of images the next day of this beautiful little stranger. He looked so happy and calm and we felt somewhat heartbroken seeing that this perfect little boy was up for adoption. Obviously for us this was a good thing but right away he was in our hearts and we wondered what he had gone through. Then came along his full profile – this included a brief summary of his life story, health history and information about his foster parents. It then clicked that he had been in care for some time for him to have foster parents. We thought that as he was so young he was coming straight to us.
Foster Parent Worries
A strange feeling came over me, that there were some other parents out there caring for our future son, it was jealousy but then worry; what if these foster parents were attached to him, what if we were snatching him away. Sally called later that day to see how we were feeling. She seemed really excited, Sally was such a brill social worker! We thanked her repeatedly then she dropped the bomb, “he will probably be with you within the month”.